How to Outsmart a Burglar

If you want to beat a criminal then it helps to think like a criminal.  Burglary is a horrible crime so let’s think like the burglar in order to outwit him (less than 10% of serious robberies are committed by women!).

Basic Ideas

1. Lock your windows and doors.  I know this is obvious but burglars often enter through unlocked windows.  A determined burglar can always break a window but they would much rather enter quietly and easily.
2. Leave a light on.  Don’t make it obvious that your house is empty.  If the house is dark in the evening, if the lawn has not been cut or if there are packages on the doorstep then the obviously unoccupied house becomes an attractive target for robbers.
3. Take care on social media.  Don’t tell people that you are going on vacation or that you are on vacation.  Post all your holiday snaps on your return.  Burglars study Facebook and other sites for clues on empty properties.  Similarly do not post pictures of your lovely new Rolex watch or other desirable luxuries.
4. Lock your car and hide valuables in the boot (or the trunk!).  An old jacket on the back seat can tempt a thief who thinks there might be a wallet in the pocket.
5. Verify the identities of any callers.  If someone claims to be from a utility company then ask to see their credentials.  Burglars often knock on doors with a phony story.  They want to see if anyone is in and what the inside of the house looks like.
6. Be careful with keys.  Do not put your door key under the doormat or flower pot.  Do not leave your car keys by the front door.  The sneak thief will rob your house and drive off in your car.  Make it as difficult for him as possible.
7. Fit security cameras and an alarm.

Lateral Ideas

1. Put up a ‘Beware of the Dog’ sign, even if you do not have a pet.  Burglars hate dogs.
2. Find clever hiding places.  Most people put their jewelry in their bedside table, or in the wardrobe, or in a jewelry box on the dressing table, or in the backs of drawers or sometimes in the freezer.  But burglars know this and they quickly turn out all the drawers and shelves.  They search all the obvious places first.  So find somewhere that is not obvious.  You can buy little safes which look just like wall sockets.
3. Use decoys.  Buy a cheap jewelry box and put inside some costume jewelry and old watches.  Buy a cheap safe and lock in it just a few old papers.  The robbers will delight in taking it way to crack at their leisure.  But the sooner they have what they think are the valuables the sooner they leave.  If you want a real safe then you will need it securely bolted into a concrete floor.
4. Take an old key that does not fit any of your locks and super-glue it to the step under your doormat.  The thief will quickly realise your trick and then look up to see your security camera.  Then he scarpers.
5. If you lock drawers – say on a filing cabinet – then that is a signal that something important is inside.  The thief will use his crowbar or angle grinder to quickly open the drawer.
6. Beware of gift tickets from strangers.  People have been given tickets to sports or music events by seemingly kind strangers.  They have returned to find their home ransacked.
7. Get someone to give your home a quick scan and security audit.  How hard is it to break in and how easy to find things?  Ideally this would be an ex-burglar, but alternatively ask a security expert or police officer.